June 14, 2011

News about Doctor Vito!

Nilda Hu.
We have been blessed, my children, not by some dumb god but by fortune itself. Word has leaked out of Fort Leavenworth -- Doctor Vito lives! But let me not tell the tale. The following is a guest post by Nilda Hu, the stylish operative from WikiLeaks who was in the Vatican dungeon as Doctor Vito was savagely brutalized by the popey guy.

Greetings blog readers,

My name is Nilda Hu and I carry a message from Doctor Vito. I managed to talk my way into Fort Leavenworth, where he's being held in unspeakably primitive conditions.

Sadly, I was not able to speak to Doctor Vito himself. The guard around him is tightly controlled. But Pfc. Bradley Manning, the famous American hero, is in the next cell and he carried Doctor Vito's message to me. I nearly threw up when I heard what he had to say.

They are not giving Doctor Vito his medical marijuana! As the world knows, Doctor Vito suffers from SBC (Serious Brain Condition) and the only treatment for this disease is daily, heavy marijuana use. If Doctor Vito does not have a joint in his hand he is very, very sick.

Pfc. Manning literally came undone as he told me this. He was crying pitifully for his friend. Manning is such an empathetic soul -- I believe he truly feels the Doctor's pain. Manning said no one should spend a minute worrying about him. Instead, he wants everyone to concentrate on the medical marijuana issue for Doctor Vito. It's very important to him. I could see it in his eyes.

And so I call out to the readers of the Worlds Blog. Do everything you can, bang and make noise, wear bells on your clothes, and spit in the face of anyone you pass who seems to be anti-Doctor Vito. What we need is hundreds of thousands of people carrying signs that say "Dope for Doctor Vito!"

I wish I could help with this noble cause but my mentor Julian Assange has plans for me. I'm off to the next hotspot -- well, after a bit of plastic surgery. I'll soon look completely different. It's how we secret agents roll. That's why I agreed to allow my photograph to appear on this blog.

Adieu! And do not forget that precious soul, Doctor Vito, who languishes in a prison simply because America has fallen in love with tyranny. This man deserves not torture or imprisonment but marijuana and our thanks! There has never been a mind as deep and incisive as Dr. Vito's. We must free him so he can eventually lead not a nation -- but the world!

I bid you farewell,
Nilda Hu

Back to me. I know readers will dive into this new campaign with vigor. We must get Doctor Vito his medical marijuana -- at least two ounces daily. We will succeed, people, because a precious man is counting on us.

Be strong! Marshal your forces and let me know what activities you plan on the local level. First we will get Dr. Vito his medicine -- and then we will free him!

1 comment:

Anna Guess Pick said...

This Saturday - 8:00 PM Eastern -

CNN Presents: WikiWars: The Mission of Julian Assange: CNN takes you into the private world of Wikileaks founder, Julian Assange. He's confrontational, mysterious, and driven.

No mention if Dr. Vito will be interviewed in this show. We can only hope.