August 1, 2013

Piggy Timmy drops another turd: Pope was "high"

Cardinal Timmy Dolan is an ugly man. And he has a blog. In a post called "What the Holy Father Said", he further "clarifies" the pope's kind words toward gays. I guess Timmy didn't say enough nasty shit on TV, so he moved to the internet to let loose. Here's how he begins his post:
Well, since everybody else is talking about it, I guess I should.
Timmy, you haven't shut up about it since it happened. He goes on (and on, and on):
I’m speaking about, of course, the Holy Father’s remarks to the journalists on the plane returning from World Youth Days in Brazil. For one, the Pope was visibly “on a high” from his first international pastoral visit in Rio.
So the poor pope didn't even know what he was saying? Cuz he was too high from all the adulation? Apparently, at least according to Timmy.
Two, mercy is the word that seems to summarize Francis’ talks...Three, mercy was not just the theme of those radiant World Youth Days in Rio, but also of his now renowned hour-and-twenty minute comfortable conversation with the press on the plane.
So that explains it. The pope was just feeling too merciful when he said those kind words about gays. Cuz he was too "high" from his trip. Ah, now we see.
So, his brief remarks on homosexuality were about mercy...No change in Church teaching here . . . or no intended “correction” to a more “dour” approach by his predecessors. 
He's referring here to Benedict's dyspeptic remarks about gays. We all know how hateful closet cases can be, and Benedict was a major closet case. But according to Timmeh, the new pope's kind words do not erase the old pope's hateful words. (Benedict said those with "deep-seated homosexual tendencies" shouldn't be accepted for the priesthood, and it is he who invented the tag "intrinsically disordered" for gay lives.) Sweet, sweet man, that Benedict. Kinda like Timmy Dolan, come to think of it. But no, Timmy assures us the new, kind words mean absolutely nothing. Gay is still very, very bad. Thanks, Timmy!

Then he veers aside for a moment to take a gratuitous stab at women priests, saying women "hardly need a Roman collar to lead and serve in the Church."

Ah, so the church won't ordain them because they "hardly need a Roman collar", eh? Sweet, Timmy. Just like everything you say. And it's very "catholic" of you to take the time to stab women when you're mostly knifing gays.

Then he wonders if the "Holy Father is frustrated" by all the coverage generated by his remarks about gays.
But, as usual, the press predictably brought these weary issues up, and have given them more ink than any of the other noble themes that rang through Copacabana Beach.  It’s not the Church that is obsessed with those topics, but the media!
Yes, Timmy. And that's why you spend 80% of your time fighting gay marriage. Because the media is "obsessed" by these topics. But not you. You're a rootin', tootin', prayin' man made in jeebus' image. How lucky for you. If you'd been born a girl, you probably would have become a waitress -- because it would allow you to flap your mouth at the customers all day long. But jeebus had a plan for you. That's why he gave you a penis. God sure knows what he's doing, huh?

Go away, Timmy. Just go away. All you do in these appearances is flaunt the rotten state of your soul. Then again, your remarks probably push more people away from your evil church, so I guess it doesn't matter. But you sure are sickening.


cm said...

You didn't have to insult waitresses like that. :) Timmeh a waitress. Shiver!
It would be nice of Francis told Timmeh to pipe down and stop "clarifying".

writenow said...

I wondered about that, too. I think Francis might really do that: "Shut up, Timmey!" Fun! I hope someone records the call and puts it on YouTube.

And you're right about me insulting waitresses with that comparison. Sorry, kids. I wasn't thinking. Actually, I love waitresses. I've even been one.