Is this the end of the lava lamp?

We hippies are required to use lava lamps. It's in the Hippie Code -- and you don't violate a thing like that. Not unless you're ready to suffer the consequences. It's a wonderful code, but very harsh on violators. Enough said about that.

But yesterday when I turned my lava lamps on, I had a horrifying realization. They need incandescent bulbs to work -- and no one sells them anymore! Horrors. What will happen to the Hippie Code?! And to hippies themselves?! I can't imagine a more dire situation. I really can't.

I'm going to write a letter to congress, alerting them to the situation. Given the importance of finding a solution, I predict there will be a bipartisan effort -- a veritable tsunami of cooperation -- thrown at this problem. I mean, imagine a world without lava lamps. You can't, right? I can't either. Jeebus! What a terrible situation.