I now control the news

I watched ABC news last night and was overjoyed to see them trash the pope, the Vatican and the cardinals. It almost seemed like I'd written the script. The segment was both accurate and snarky. It ended by saying that Cardinal Mahony, who hid LA's rapist priests, had compared his well-deserved humiliation to the pain suffered by Jesus.

It was great fun. But of course, these newsfolk have no mettle and even less memory. They'll soon be kneeling reverently as they watch white smoke curl into the sky. But you can't deny the majesty of this moment in time, when all the world can see the evil Vatican for what it is -- a group of old men who care about no one but themselves.

Death porn

A lot was made recently about a NYC newspaper that printed a photo of a man who was about to be killed by a subway train. Yes, it was disgusting. But they do this all the time.

Yesterday, an 11-year-old boy was killed by a dump truck as he tried to cross the street. Local TV stations played endless loops of video of the boy buying a soda and something to eat at a deli -- seconds before he walked into the street and was killed. The video also showed him fixing his jacket and schoolbag on the sidewalk outside the store after his purchase, and stepping toward his death.

This is not okay. It's death porn and it's disgusting that the news people show this sort of thing. Yes, report on the boy's death. But don't try to titillate the viewers -- not when you're talking about a death, and especially when it's a child. I'm not even sure the parents should see that video, never mind random viewers.

I called the media vampires the other day. But it's worse than that. They're ghouls, eating the dead before our eyes. It's utterly disgusting. And if this happens in our country on a regular basis -- which it does -- then we are disgusting. Welcome to the United States of 2012.

Vampire media

It's time for the media to pack up their microphones and cameras and be gone from Newtown -- but they won't leave until the last blood has been sucked from grieving residents. The reporters are vampires; this is what they do for a living.

Yesterday on CBS, I saw a female vampire interviewing a teenager. The young man said, "My neighbor up the street...her kid didn't come home." The reporter's response was to push the microphone closer to the kid's mouth and ask, "How was that?"

Ugh. Leave these poor people to their grief. Depart, unclean spirits. Return to the depths from whence you came.

Our super-smart Supreme Court justices

Trying to defend the court's outlandish and un-American decision to extend First Amendment rights to corporations, Sam Alito showed how little he understands this country.

Alito rattled off the names of the nation's leading newspapers and television networks, all owned by corporations and possessing acknowledged rights to print and say what they wish about politics and government.

"The question is whether speech that goes to the very heart of government should be limited to certain preferred corporations; namely, media corporations," he said. "Surely the idea that the First Amendment protects only certain privileged voices should be disturbing to anybody who believes in free speech." 

The man doesn't see a difference between media and non-media corporations! It's like he's never lived in this country and simply studied it from afar by reading rightwing newspapers. Journalism doesn't exist in the world Alito inhabits. Can you believe how far the court has fallen? People used to respect the Supremes. Now they laugh at them.

A good head shot

Have you noticed this trend? A person is killed in some awful way and the media take the poor soul's Facebook head-shot and use it for their murder/suicide/wood chipper story. It's dreadful. Here's this ridiculous photo where the person is trying to project a fairytale image of him- or herself, and it ends up as the punchy graphic for their epitaph. May I say, "ugh" for all of us?

Norway's infamous mass murderer reportedly said, (I'm paraphrasing) "be sure you have a great head shot" before doing something like murdering 60 kids. Grand advice for a mindless public. I'm surprised the "look at me" American public doesn't go around with a camera dangling from its collective forehead, lest a single image of their life go unnoticed.

And I'm greatly surprised that no one has installed a camera in their coffin, so it can send a daily updated image to their Facebook page, accompanied by a year or two of posts which the deceased handily wrote beforehand. "Hi, it's me! Don't I look fabulous?" It's only a matter of time before this occurs.

Dog save us all.

What is wrong with the media?

I see so much off-the-wall wording in media stories. It's all over the place:

Romney trumpets rush of conservative endorsements . . .

Obama touts whatever . . .

Seriously, what's wrong with these people? They can't just write a clear and factual news item. Instead, they jam every story into one of their pre-fab molds that are designed to make politics into a game. It's not only stupid, it's destructive.

An emboldened Obama . . .

A volley of words from . . .

Gingrich soldiers on . . .

I mean really. They're myth-making. Their goal is not to report anything; it's to create waves, wonderful waves that will bring the papers and TV stations more business. Talk about ulterior motives. They're playing games with the lifeblood of our country and they don't give a damn. It's sickening.

And the following actual headline is no better:

April leap or May slog, Romney on pace to GOP nod

Oy. I think this means the headline writers have fallen off a cliff.